The night was once again a little rocky. Rather than reduce Mom's stool softener as discussed by one of the doctors, one of the nurses tried to administer an increased dosage, which given the way Mom's digestive track was acting, was a little disconcerting. Fortunately, Mom was aware of the error and able to refuse the excess drugs. This did not prevent her from having the same digestive issue as the night before. The next morning she still managed to eat toast and scrambled eggs with ketchup (something she has an unusual craving for). When I arrived, she met with a substitute physical therapist who cleared me to walk with her on the weekends as well as did some exercises with her after a walk in the hall. The exercises unfortunately triggered the same digestive problem she had been having making her feel clammy and faint after the episode not to mention ending her exercise for the morning. Mom then retired to her bed where she made a feeble attempt to eat lunch and refused a visit with the occupational therapist, having recurrent pain in her abdomen. Shortly after, the geriatric doctor visited Mom and promised to sort out the confusion over the medication last night as well as said she could postpone the change of her would sponges until Saturday. Mom was quite happy about this change of schedule. Later, her sister, Terri, and brother-in-law, Billy, visited while she was having dinner. She was quite happy to see them.
It seems that for Mom's recovery one of the most critical items is exercise. Both her rest and exercise have been greatly inhibited by her digestive problem of eliminating too quickly. We should pray that her digestive track would function more normally, she could get adequate rest tonight, and that she would exercise on a regular basis.
Stephen
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My heart is full of thankfulness to the Lord for manifesting Himself in various ways to you all...through the encouragement of the saints, through the wisdom and care of the doctors and nurses..He is ever present, loving so dearly. May He continue to give each of you strength. Thank you for your updates, they help guide us in prayer! Grace and peace in abundance...
Some things I have learned as the caregiver to a cancer patient. Some of these are from a caregiver’s perspective and some are from the perspective of the cancer patient to the best of my understanding. They are in no particular order
I know you feel like Peter where the Lord told him some day his hands and feet would be bound and he would be led where he did not want to go. I know the Lord goes with us wherever our journey leads.
I know you/your spouse/your family feel really afraid sometimes about life, death, family, pain, money, being alone . . . I know the Lord can calm all fears.
I know you have sudden waves of deep sorrow you cannot contain and you try to not let anyone know you are crying. If anyone asks you why you are crying, you might not be able to tell them. I know it is ok to feel that way. It happens at such unexpected moments, you cannot even predict it coming on. A word, a look, a touch, a hymn – anything can trigger it.
I know EVERYONE has advice about what to eat or what to do to cure cancer. They tell you because they love you. I know you can’t do what everyone tells you and you have to find your own path and be comfortable with it. And I know you have to find a way to thank everyone but still let them know you might not try their cure.
I know when you take Decadron you may talk too much, sing too loud, become very emotional, and you may say things that hurt others even though you don’t mean it. I know your family eventually will realize you have no control over what this drug does to you and they will make allowances. Sometimes they will even tease you or say, “Mom is on Dex.” Then everyone understands.
I know there is more information on the internet than you ever wanted to know about your kind of cancer. I know you keep reading it.
I know you should take the drugs that make you sleepy at night so you don’t miss a day.
I know you should read the side effects for ALL your drugs and be aware of them at all times.
I know your spouse/family really appreciates it when they can talk to someone and the conversation does not end up being about cancer. Everyone needs a break sometimes.
I know that caregivers hurt too, but often they don’t tell because their pain seems so insignificant compared to yours, and besides, everyone is so concerned about the cancer patient, who could have anything left over for the caregiver? I know that there are some people who really care about the caregivers and don’t mind them venting now and then. Surprise! Other caregivers experience the same things, but you don’t find out until you open up.
I know caregivers feel guilty for feeling depressed/discouraged about their situation when they realize how much worse it could be. I know that it doesn’t matter. If you hurt, you hurt, even if your situation isn’t as bad as someone else’s.
I know that the saints really love you and want to help in any way they can. I know most of them don’t know how and feel at a loss. I know the saints really appreciate when you ask for something specific.
I know how good it feels to come home late and hungry from being a long time visiting in the hospital and have a message on your answering machine from the saints down the street saying they made too much lasagna and if you want it – if you want it?? – you can have it. I know how fast you return that call!
I know how to be thankful for each new day.
I know sometimes you cry because you are happy.
I know having cancer feels like you are in the wilderness. I know the Lord knows the way through the wilderness. He has been there. The trip takes 40 days – not 39 and not 41. I have discovered there are angels in the wilderness that will minister to your needs.
Joanne, we love you and are praying for you and your family. May the Lord be your constant, rich supply.
Wayne & Ruth Johnsen
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