Entering into the joy of the Lord

The surgery is one week from Thursday - please pray for the surgeon and for every detail of the surgery - the anesthesia, the procedure and the recovery. Hallelujah we are in the Lord's hands.

This past week I have been considering the matter of suffering and being dealt with in our circumstances. I know that as Christians we are in the process of being transformed and this requires the losing of the soul-life or denying the self. As I considered how I could possibly deny the self, I realized that any attempt in myself to do this kind of denying will cause the self to grow and be fortified. Yet the word is clear: He who loves his soul-life will lose it and he who denies his soul-life will gain it in the coming age.

So, what is the soul, and how do we lose the soul-life and what exactly is the soul our transformation is a freeing process. I used to think it was a hard, rather difficult thing to be transformed - but this week I realized that what is happening is that we are in the process of being freed from the tyranny of the law of sin and of death. The law of sin - causes us to be a slave of sin. The footnote in Romans 8:2 from the Recovery Version of the Bible about the working of this law is very enlightening:

26 The law of sin, the power to commit sin that arises spontaneously in man, causes man to become a slave of sin (John 8:34). Thus, man is helpless, is controlled and manipulated by sin, and does many things against his will. The law of death, the natural power that causes man to become weak, to wither up, and to age and die, dwells in man and causes every part of man to enter into decay and death. On one hand, death disables man; on the other hand, it desensitizes man. It causes man to be disabled when he attempts to do good, and to be insensitive when he commits sins.


So transformation is the process of the life of God freeing us completely from the law of sin and death.

So to deny the self really is not to create a vacuum within us where we stop doing something - but it is rather being drawn by the Lord to enjoy what He enjoys. It is really something to realize that the Lord Jesus, for the joy set before Him, endured the cross. (Hebrews 12:2) What was His joy? I did a search on the word joy in the New Testament and a few verses stood out to me:


Matthew 25:23

23 His master said to him, Well done, good and faithful slave. You were faithful over a few things; I will set you over many things. Enter into the joy of your master.

John 15 : 11

11 These things I have spoken to you that My joy may be in you and that your joy may be made full.

Romans 14:17

17 For the kingdom of God is not eating and drinking, but righteousness and peace and joy in the Holy Spirit.

Galatians 5:22

22 But the fruit of the Spirit is love, joy, peace, long-suffering, kindness, goodness, faithfulness,

Hebrews 12 : 2

2 Looking away unto Jesus, the Author and Perfecter of our faith, who for the joy set before Him endured the cross, despising the shame, and has sat down on the right hand of the throne of God.


In considering these verses, it seems that the Lord's joy had to do with the Father's will - Psalms 40 : 8

8 I delight in doing Your will, O My God; Indeed Your law is within My inward parts.


So the Lord's joy is directly related to doing the Father's will - Denying the self happens spontaneously as we enjoy the Lord and His joy becomes our joy. As we enjoy Him, little by little we are freed from the tyranny of the law of sin and of death and we are more and more living according to the Law of the Spirit of Life!

Gain us more today, Lord!

Here is a wonderful hymn about this process of transformation! It is also a great prayer to pray to the Lord. Here's a link to the tune: Click Here


1 God’s intention is to have us
All conformed to His dear Son;
Thus a work of transformation
By the Spirit must be done.

Chorus
Lord, transform us to Thine image
In emotion, mind, and will;
Saturate us with Thy Spirit,
All our being wholly fill.

2 God hath us regenerated
In our spirit with His life;
But He must transform us further-
In our soul by His own life.

3 Spreading outward from our spirit
Doth the Lord transform our soul,
By the inward parts renewing,
Till within His full control.

4 By the power of His Spirit
In His pattern He transforms;
From His glory to His glory
To His image He conforms.

5 He transforms, all sanctifying,
Till like Him we are matured;
He transforms, our soul possessing,
Till His stature is secured.


Praise Him for His marvelous work!
Much love,
Joanne

Surgery Update

I saw the pre-op nurse practitioner yesterday and got some of the details of the upcoming surgery. They will attempt to do it laparoscopically but if they are not able since it is rather large, they will have to do regular abdominal surgery. But the nurse told me that if anyone can do it, Dr. Brooks can. One of the problems following surgery is that a large amount of CO2 is pumped into the abdominal cavity so that all the organs can be viewed more easily - this causes a great deal of pain following surgery but walking usually helps the body absorb the CO2. Depending on what happens, I will at least spend one night at BWH.

The Victory of Resurrection

Last winter, the ornamental cherry tree in our front yard was severely damaged by a heavy, wet snow storm. I watched in horror as a large limb of the tree broke off. We all thought that it would never recover and really mourned its loss. It is really majestic in the spring when the soft pink flowers blossom - it takes your breath away, really. Well, today, Patriots' Day in Massachusetts, Spring is definitely here and different bushes, trees and bulbs are waking up from the long winter. It is always such a delight to see the different flowers, and to see the buds appear on those seemingly dead tree branches. I walked by the window this morning and looked out at the cherry tree, sadly anticipating the absence of its former beauty. However, this morning there was triumph in that tree, for in spite of its being broken, cherry blossoms were just blooming! I said, even though it is broken, it is still beautiful. Actually it is more beautiful in some ways. That damage, that breaking, did not stop the life within the tree from being expressed! I had to upload a picture for you to see. In the middle of the tree is the jagged stump of the limb that broke off this winter. At its base, you can see the limb that broke off - how huge it was and also you can gauge how much the tree lost. This caused me to think about the Christian life and the following verses in 2 Corinthians 4:16-18:

16 Therefore we do not lose heart; but though our outer man is decaying, yet our inner man is being renewed day by day.

17 For our momentary lightness of affliction works out for us, more and more surpassingly, an eternal weight of glory,

18 Because we do not regard the things which are seen but the things which are not seen; for the things which are seen are temporary, but the things which are not seen are eternal.


There is footnote in the Recovery Version about being renewed in verse 16 that talks about resurrection life:
16-3 By being nourished with the fresh supply of the resurrection life. As our mortal body, our outer man, is being consumed by the killing work of death, our inner man, that is, our regenerated spirit with the inward parts of our being (Jer. 31:33; Heb. 8:10; Rom. 7:22, 25), is being metabolically renewed day by day with the supply of the resurrection life.


I also thought about Lazarus, who in John 11 had died and whom Jesus brought back from the dead and how both Mary and Martha missed seeing that Jesus was the resurrection and the life. There is a very touching footnote for verse 14 where Jesus says plainly that Lazarus had died:

14-1 In the Lord's salvation He does not merely heal the sick; He also gives life to the dead. Hence, He remained two days until the sick one had died (v. 6). The Lord does not reform or regulate people — He regenerates people and raises them out of death. Hence, the first of the nine cases in chs. 3-11 was a case of regeneration, and the last was a case of resurrection, revealing that all the aspects of Christ as life to us, as unveiled in the other seven cases, are in the principle of regeneration and resurrection. This last case was the actual changing of death into life.

Only the Lord can change death into life - how marvelous! The Lord gives life to the dead! He raised Lazarus. The cherry blossoms on that tree are a reminder to me that life triumphs over death! There is another great verse in 1 Corinthians 15:54:
54 And when this corruptible will put on incorruption and this mortal will put on immortality, then the word which is written will come to pass, "Death has been swallowed up unto victory.

Here's a great footnote about victory:
54-3 This chapter is on resurrection. Christ's resurrection was His victory over Satan, God's enemy, over the world, over sin, and over death. After His triumphal ascension to the height (Eph. 4:8) in His resurrection, God subdued all the enemies for Him (v. 25). Then, as One who is in resurrection, He will come to the earth with the kingdom of God (Dan. 7:13-14) to exercise God's power and subdue everything on earth. This will continue for a thousand years (Rev. 20:4, 6). The last enemy to be abolished is death. The swallowing up of death will result in the ultimate victory of the Lord's resurrection, that is, in the ultimate and complete victory that He has accomplished in resurrection for us who believe in Him and participate in His resurrection. This is the ultimate issue of His resurrection for His and God's eternal kingdom and for the eternal enjoyment of His resurrection life in eternity by those who believe in Him.

I often enjoy this hymn about resurrection life:

1Death cannot hold the resurrection life,
The life of God eternal manifest;
’Tis uncreated, indestructible,
’Tis Christ Himself, unconqu’rable, expressed

2 Death cannot hold the resurrection life,
Though all its force against it may combine;
Death only gives it opportunity
To show the boundless pow’r of life divine.

3 Death cannot hold the resurrection life,
The more interred, the more it multiplies;
All kinds of suff’ring only help it grow
And fruits of life abundant realize.

4 Death cannot hold the resurrection life,
Thru every block and barrier it breaks;
Conqu’ring the pow’r of darkness and of hell,
It swallows death and victory partakes.

5 Death cannot hold the resurrection life,
All of God’s fulness it will manifest;
God’s righteousness and holiness it yields,
His glorious image by it is expressed.

6 Oh, may I know this resurrection life,
In every kind of death its pow’r outpoured,
In my experience ever realize
This life is nought but Christ my living Lord.

So the breaking of that cherry tree was not its end - when we experience the breaking of our outer man, we have hope - blessed hope that our inner man is being renewed! The outward breaking is not the end - it is the means to being renewed.

Oh Lord, may we know this resurrection life and in every kind of death enjoy its power outpoured. May we all enjoy the death swallowing, and victory partaking life that indwells us.

Praise Him!

More about the upcoming surgery tomorrow after I meet with the doctors at BWH. Please pray for a speedy recovery from this cold so it will not interfere with the surgery schedule.

Much love,
Joanne

Grace upon grace

Hello everyone,
I go to Brigham and Women's next Tuesday for the pre-op visit. Hopefully everything will go smoothly - I am getting a cold but hope that all those immune-boosting supplements along with the Zoe life of God will not allow the virus to take hold. Not much activity on the home front - we are still getting estimates from contractors. Today is April 15 - the crunch day for Paul - please continue to pray for him as he finishes up all the taxes in the midst of chaos. Also please pray for wisdom for me about when I should stop taking the supplements before the surgery.

This morning I was considering the title of this website along with the verse from 1 Peter 4:10 and thought about the "traditional" definition of grace which is God's unmerited favor. Now, I am not a Bible scholar nor do I know Greek, but I did some research this morning about this word. First of all, it appears 128times in the New Testament. Here are a few definitions from well-known resources:

Strong’s Dictionary of New Testament words defines the Greek word for ‘grace’ as follows:

“grace” = 5485 charis (khar'-ece); from 5463; graciousness (as gratifying), of manner or act (abstract or concrete; literal, figurative or spiritual; especially the divine influence upon the heart, and its reflection in the life; including gratitude): KJV-- acceptable, benefit, favor, gift, grace (-ious), joy, liberality, pleasure, thank (-s, -worthy).

Strong’s says that charis comes from a root word, “chairo” which is defined as follows:

chairo (khah'-ee-ro); a primary verb; to be "cheerful", i.e. calmly happy or well-off; impersonally, especially as salutation (on meeting or parting), be well: KJV-- farewell, be glad, God speed, greeting, hall, joy (-fully), rejoice.

Vine’s Expository Dictionary of New Testament words says of charis:

GRACE = 1. charis ^5485^ has various uses, (a) objective, that which bestows or occasions pleasure, delight, or causes favorable regard. (From Vine's Expository Dictionary of Biblical Words) (Copyright (C) 1985, Thomas Nelson Publishers)

What really touched me about these definitions were two things: the divine influence upon the heart and all the references to joy, pleasure, delight. So, while grace surely is God's unmerited favor - it is more - it has to do with the divine influence upon the heart which issues in joy. Hence the verse in 1 Peter 4:10 about the varied grace of God. As I considered grace, I realized that we are in the age of grace - the age of the possibility for God to influence our heart to the extent that we enjoy Him! What an age to live in! How much we need to take advantage of this age of grace. Even the throne of God is the throne of grace! Hebrews 4:16 says:
Let us therefore come forward with boldness to the throne of grace that we may receive mercy and find grace for timely help.

When God became incarnate and stepped into humanity, that was an expression of grace. Grace came through Jesus Christ: John 1:17: For the law was given through Moses; grace and reality came through Jesus Christ.

The footnote from the Recovery Version says:
The law makes demands on man according to what God is; grace supplies man with what God is to meet what God demands. The law, at most, was only a testimony of what God is (Exo. 25:21), but reality is the realization of what God is. No man can partake of God through the law, but grace enables man to enjoy God. Reality is God realized by man, and grace is God enjoyed by man.

One of the names of God is "the God of all grace". All grace is significant here in light of the suffering a little while in 1 Peter 5:10:
But the God of all grace, He who has called you into His eternal glory in Christ Jesus, after you have suffered a little while, will Himself perfect, establish, strengthen, and ground you.

The footnote for all grace is really marvelous:
All grace refers to the riches of the bountiful supply of the divine life in many aspects ministered to us in many steps of the divine operation on and in us in God's economy. The initial step is to call us, and the consummate step is to glorify us, as mentioned here in who has called you into His eternal glory. Between these two steps are God's loving care while He is disciplining us, and His perfecting, establishing, strengthening, and grounding work in us. In all these divine acts, the bountiful supply of the divine life is ministered to us as grace in varied experiences. The God of such grace will perfect, establish, strengthen, and ground the persecuted believers after they have suffered a little while.
Surely the grace we receive outweighs the burden of the suffering so our affliction can be referred to as momentary and light: 2 Corinthians 4:17: For our momentary lightness of affliction works out for us, more and more surpassingly, an eternal weight of glory,

So grace is ministered to us in each of our suffering experiences and is more than sufficient. Corinthians 12:9: And He has said to me, My grace is sufficient for you, for My power is perfected in weakness. Most gladly therefore I will rather boast in my weaknesses that the power of Christ might tabernacle over me.

Here the footnote speaks of why suffering is required:

For the sufficiency of the Lord's grace to be magnified, our sufferings are required; for the perfectness of the Lord's power to be shown forth, our weakness is needed. Hence, the apostle would most gladly boast in his weaknesses that the power of Christ might tabernacle over him. Grace is the supply, and power is the strength, the ability, of grace. Both are the resurrected Christ, who is now the life-giving Spirit dwelling in us (1 Cor. 15:45; Gal. 2:20) for our enjoyment.

Another wonderful verse about grace is in Ephesians 1:6: To the praise of the glory of His grace, with which He graced us in the Beloved;

God has put is in the position of being the object of His grace and favor, that is, that we may enjoy all that He is to us!

No wonder John Newton wrote that grace is amazing!

Here is a wonderful hymn about grace and a link to the tune - in case you want to sing along:

Link to tune:

1 Grace in its highest definition is
God in the Son to be enjoyed by us;
It is not only something done or giv’n,
But God Himself, our portion glorious.

2 God is incarnate in the flesh that we
Him may receive, experience ourself;
This is the grace which we receive of God,
Which comes thru Christ and which is Christ Himself.

3 Paul the Apostle counted all as dung,
’Twas only God in Christ he counted grace;
’Tis by this grace-the Lord experienced-
That he surpassed the others in the race.

4 It is this grace-Christ as our inward strength-
Which with His all-sufficiency doth fill;
It is this grace which in our spirit is,
There energizing, working out God’s will.

5 This grace, which is the living Christ Himself,
Is what we need and must experience;
Lord, may we know this grace and by it live,
Thyself increasingly as grace to sense.


So dear ones, enjoy the grace that is your portion today!

Much love,
Joanne

Seeing Dr. Berlin

Hi Everyone,
Just a quick update - I saw Dr. Berlin today - after waiting 2.5 hours to see her! They say she spends a lot of time with her patients and that is why she is always late. I guess that's a good reason. I was able to do some reading while I waited and waited. I was in a great room on the corner of the building on the 9th floor that has two windows on the corner and around the office on two sides giving a great view of the whole Boston Medical area. Dr. Berlin told me that the chest CT scan showed nodularity that they couldn't distinguish - she says it means that one area of gray was not as smooth as other areas of gray and so she says that the only way they can tell if it is some new growth is to rescan - which they are going to do in July! My CA125 was 5, like it was in January. Anything below 35 is considered "normal." The hernia is something that needs to be taken care of because of how much of the colon is involved. I asked her about any complications with having the surgery - she felt that is was a quality of life decision since I can't continue to go around with that huge bulge. She said we have to take the high road in this field and we have to live like we are going to live! Amen to that! I am so thankful to the Lord for all that He has provided through this and other doctors at Dana Farber. That place is really something special – even the parking people are kind!

Dr. Berlin did want me to see a Dr. Rosenthal at the Zakim Center at Dana Farber – he is a “complementary” care doctor who could review the supplements I am taking through the naturopathic doctor. I didn’t have a chance to see him today but I will call him soon.

Well, I must get back to my reading.

Much love,
Joanne

Hello everyone,
We are still ceilingless in 3 rooms and are awaiting to see what the insurance company will do about funding the repairs. I have been thanking the Lord for those 16 years I lived in a very small house, because now we are crammed into the dining room and our bedroom with Paul's files, the computer, desks etc! While this isn't a great suffering, it has the potential to drive me crazy - so thanking the Lord has been a great way to subdue that urge to complain. I see Dr. Berlin on Wednesday but I won't know anything about the blood tests for a couple of days. Last week I was having abdominal pain but it has subsided - I think I was doing too much with the flooded house.

I don't know if you do this, but usually when a date comes that has significance historically in my life, I pause to consider what have I gained or have I changed much - this self-evaluation is usually not the best endeavor because I often doubt that there has been much change and also wonder if I have gained much of the Lord. Of course, this past Saturday was one of those days as it marked one year since I received the diagnosis and had that moment of having my life flashing before me. At that time, when the doctor told me I had tumors that were most likely cancer, tearfully doing a quick assessment of my life, I said to Paul (my husband), "I have no regrets. I have not spent my life in a vain way pursuing what I thought I would pursue before I met the Lord. He has mercifully rescued me from a life of vanity, pursing the wind, to one of reality, pursuing Him." There was great relief at that moment, that if I had to see the Lord face to face soon, at least I would not be ashamed about how I had spent the days He had given me. What a mercy that was to me.

But then over the next months, I began to seek the Lord about why this was necessary? What was God's point that He was trying to make? I worried that if I didn't learn the lesson, then perhaps I would have to repeat the "class". I think I got the answer. The sufferings, allowed by a faithful God, will be used by Him to bring each of us into more of the reality of Who He is, and will help us explore the depths of supply found in His Word. But suffering cannot be examined separately from God's economy - which is God dispensing Himself into us as our life and life supply. The suffering is not to make us model Christians who bear everything well, but rather to constitute us with God, with the Divine life, and make us utterly dependent on Him. How sad to go through suffering and come out more fortified in natural strength. That is how the world views adversity - that if you endure it, you will come out stronger. But the Lord's view is quite different. His goal is that we would decrease and He would increase; that He would do, as Charles Wesley wrote in the hymn Hark the Herald Angels Sing, Adam's image now erase, stamp Thine image in its place!

Regarding the matter of self-examination or introspection, here is something from the Collected Works of Watchman Nee, vol. 38 that addresses this issue and is really helpful:

Among God's children, there is nothing more damaging than introspection. Let us bear this in mind—the most damaging thing is to turn our gaze inward. This may be even more serious than sin. Sin is readily recognized as such, but introspection is not detected so easily. An unsuspected disease is always more serious and damaging than an apparent one. If you were asked whether it is wrong to be proud, you would immediately answer that it is obviously wrong. If you were asked whether it is wrong to be envious, you would know quite well that it is wrong. These flaws are obvious. But you can become introspective twenty times in a single day without any sense of wrongdoing. If you quarrel, you soon become aware that you have done something wrong; you quickly identify your sickness. But you can be introspective and be totally unaware of its evil. Looking within is the most hurtful thing in the Christian life. Many Christians are given to introspection, and they are living a life of false spirituality. There is no profit in introspection. The greatest damage a Christian can suffer comes from introspection; it will cheat you.

So rather than looking within, we need to look away! (Hebrews 12:2)

Some verses I have been enjoying about this matter of suffering:

Hebrews 12:11
11 Now no discipline at the present time seems to be a matter of joy, but of grief; but afterward it yields the 1apeaceable fruit of righteousness to those who have been exercised by it.

1 Peter 1:6-7;
6 In which time you exult, though for a little while at present, if it must be, you have been made sorrowful by various trials,

7 So that the proving of your faith, much more precious than of gold which perishes though it is proved by fire, may be found unto praise and glory and honor at the revelation of Jesus Christ;

1 Peter 4:12-13
12 Beloved, do not think that the fiery ordeal among you, coming to you for a trial, is strange, as if it were a strange thing happening to you;

13 But inasmuch as you share in the sufferings of Christ, rejoice, so that also at the revelation of His glory you may rejoice exultingly.

Psalm 66:10
10 For You have tried us, O God; You have refined us as silver is refined.

I offer this hymn that is a great way to pray concerning this matter. The hymn was written by Brother Watchman Nee.

1 Olives that have known no pressure
No oil can bestow;
If the grapes escape the winepress,
Cheering wine can never flow;
Spikenard only through the crushing,
Fragrance can diffuse.
Shall I then, Lord, shrink from suff’ring
Which Thy love for me would choose?

Chorus
Each blow I suffer
Is true gain to me.
In the place of what Thou takest
Thou dost give Thyself to me.

2 Do my heart-strings need Thy stretching,
Songs divine to prove?
Do I need for sweetest music
Cruel treatment of Thy love?
Lord, I fear no deprivation
If it draws to Thee;
I would yield in full surrender
All Thy heart of love to see.

3 I’m ashamed, my Lord, for seeking
Self to guard alway;
Though Thy love has done its stripping,
Yet I’ve been compelled this way.
Lord, according to Thy pleasure
Fully work on me;
Heeding not my human feelings,
Only do what pleases Thee.

4 If Thy mind and mine should differ,
Still pursue Thy way;
If Thy pleasure means my sorrow,
Still my heart shall answer, “Yea!”
’Tis my deep desire to please Thee,
Though I suffer loss;
E’en though Thy delight and glory
Mean that I endure the cross.

5 Oh, I’ll praise Thee, e’en if weeping
Mingle with my song.
Thine increasing sweetness calls forth
Grateful praises all day long.
Thou hast made Thyself more precious
Than all else to me:
Thou increase and I decrease, Lord-
This is now my only plea.

In the place of what Thou takest, Thou dost give Thyself to me! Praise the Lord!
What a great exchange! This is a promise we can believe - that the Lord causes all things to work together for good. What is good? That we would be conformed to His image - that self would decrease and He would increase.

I hope this blog has been useful over the past year - it has been a means for the Lord to flow out to reach you all when I have not been physically able. Your encouraging comments have sustained me and have exhibited God's loving care to me.

Much love,
Joanne