Strength for the day

Day by day I feel like I have more strength for part of the day - although I am dealing with achy joints and intestinal difficulties - perhaps this will just be the way things are since I had that colon surgery which bypasses a good part of my large intestine. The achy joints may be a side effect of the chemo - I am going to start taking salmon oil and glucosamine to help with that. I still need to rest in the afternoon but I've been trying to do some cooking - which has been fun.

Today I have to go to Dana Farber to get the IV ports flushed - they have to access both ports (I have a double) with those one inch needles and flush them with saline and heparin (I think). I will also have blood tests. The nurses there are experts at this and there isn't usually too much pain involved. I will have to do this monthly while the IV ports are still in. I am not sure about when that port will be removed since I have terrible veins and the port makes blood tests much easier. I believe the IP port removal will be scheduled after December 12th but I haven't heard back from the nurse yet with the official date. It is day surgery at Brigham and Women's Hospital. Hopefully this will be a quick recovery.

It is hard for me these days to discern which aches and pains to pay attention to and which ones I should just ignore - I used to ignore everything and I think that practice got me where I am today. As human beings we are so inept to find our way in these kind of situations - but I was reminded of those verses in the gospel of John 14:6 - Jesus said to him, I am the way and the reality and the life; no one comes to the Father except through Me.

Here is a footnote about the way: The way for man to enter into God is the Lord Himself. Since the way is a living person, the place to which the Lord brings man must also be a person, God the Father Himself. The Lord Himself is the living way by which man is brought into God the Father, the living place. The way needs the reality, and the reality needs the life. The Lord Himself is the life to us. This life brings us the reality, and the reality becomes the way by which we enter into the enjoyment of God the Father.

So I realize that while I am rather inept at knowing what to do at times, the way is the Lord Himself. He is a living person who indwells my spirit and He knows the way - so daily as I touch Him, He will be the way for me. It is comforting to know that we are not alone muddling through our life, trying our best to make the right decisions - we are joined to the Lord in our spirit - we do not have to depend on ourselves but can lean on Him. Hallelujah!

Annie Johnson Flint wrote a hymn about strength for the day - I think I have posted here before - the chorus says
But God hath promised strength for the day,
Rest for the labor, light for the way,
Grace for the trials, help from above,
Unfailing sympathy, undying love.

I found a poem she wrote that must have been the inspiration for this hymn. I hope you are encouraged by it:
ONE DAY AT A TIME
By Annie Johnson Flint

One day at a time, with its failures and fears,
With its hurts and mistakes, with its weakness and tears,
With its portion of pain and its burden of care;
One day at a time we must meet and must bear.

One day at a time to be patient and strong;
To be calm under trial and sweet under wrong;
Then its toiling shall pass and its sorrow shall cease;
It shall darken and die, and the night shall bring peace.

One day at a time – but the day is so long,
And the heart is not brave, and the soul is not strong,
O Thou pitiful Christ, be Thou near all the way;
Give courage and patience and strength for the day.

Swift cometh His answer, so clear and so sweet;
“Yea, I will be with thee, thy troubles to meet;
I will not forget thee, nor fail thee, nor grieve;
I will not forsake thee; I never will leave.”

Not yesterday’s load we are called on to bear,
Nor the morrow’s uncertain and shadowy care;
Why should we look forward or back with dismay?
Our needs, as our mercies, are but for the day.

One day at a time, and the day is His day;
He hath numbered its hours, though they haste or delay.
His grace is sufficient; we walk not alone;
As the day, so the strength that He giveth His own.


Praise Him for today's portion of grace, and for the strength that He gives His own!
Much love to all of you,
Joanne

Recovering from "too much chopping"

Hi everyone,
It has taken a few days to recover from the seemingly endless chopping, baking, cooking, dishwashing and recipe reading that went on for the Thanksgiving dinner we enjoyed this week. My mom and my daughter Anna worked so hard. My brother Mike and his wife, Ai-Lien also came on Thanksgiving and worked very hard - we couldn't have done it without them. I petered out after about 15 minutes into the meal and had to lie down (for 4 hours - it turned out). I missed saying good bye to everyone but really enjoyed every moment of the day. What a wonderful opportunity to gather together and thank the Lord for all He is and has accomplished for us! Ephesians 5:20 says: "Giving thanks at all times for all things in the name of our Lord Jesus Christ to our God and Father," and 1 Thessalonians 5:18 says "In everything give thanks; for this is the will of God in Christ Jesus for you."
In addition, there is a church conference in Boston, so each afternoon I have had visits and telephone calls from people I haven't seen in a long time - I am not able to attend the conference but am so thankful for these visits. What a rich inheritance we have in each other! I wouldn't be here today without all of you!

Since this was a holiday weekend, I don't have any information regarding the upcoming surgery - I hope to know more when I call on Monday.

May the Lord richly bless each of you with abundant grace,and with a spirit of wisdom and revelation in the full knowledge of Him!

Joanne

Slow recovery

Sorry for the delay in writing - it has been a long, slow process recovering from this last chemo treatment. I also went off all pain meds and am having withdrawal symptoms (headache, fatigue) and still have the intestinal issues which also make me weak. I went to a store with Anna and lasted about 10 minutes before I had to return to the car. It seems like I have no reserve supply of energy so when I use up what I have, I just about collapse. I don't do well with headaches and have a whopper of one today. I also haven't been sleeping well - but when I wake up I take the time to pray! I'm planning a Thanksgiving dinner and hope to have the energy to be there. Anna is doing most of the cooking - which is a real blessing. My mom is coming to stay for the week and my brother Michael and his family will also be here as well as Stephen and Andrew and other people that Anna has invited. It will be a full house - but I thoroughly enjoy this holiday - its roots are so wonderful - giving thanks for all that the Lord has done for us. We have so much to be thankful for. Each day when I open my eyes (even if it is 4:00 am) I thank the Lord for another day and consecrate it to Him - that throughout the day I would be one who ministers Christ to people and not just my problems or myself...

I read these verses yesterday and I was so encouraged:

2 Peter 1:3-4,
3 Seeing that His divine power has granted to us all things which relate to life and godliness, through the full knowledge of Him who has called us by His own glory and virtue,

4 Through which He has granted to us precious and exceedingly great promises that through these you might become partakers of the divine nature, having escaped the corruption which is in the world by lust.

I was so encouraged that we have been granted all things which relate to life and godliness and we have been given precious promises so that we can become partakers of the divine nature! How marvelous is this! So each day we can stand of the promises of God when we pray Lord keep me partaking of You today. Thank you for all things which relate to Life!

As the Lord leads, please continue to pray that the side effects of the chemo will subside and I will be stronger - also please pray for the upcoming surgery when they will remove the IP port. It is not scheduled yet but should be sometime in December.

Thank you all for all the different manifestations of love - by your calls, emails, meals, serving our family - it has been and continues to be such a supply to all of us and reminds me daily that the Lord, whose name is El Roi, is the God who sees and is supplying a superabundant supply of grace. You all are the channels of His grace - and I am so thankful for you all!

Much love,
Joanne

Trying to stay hydrated

Well, it's been awhile since I last wrote - I have had a tough week - last Saturday I had to go back to Dana Farber to get hydrated and get some potassium and magnesium. It seems that the chemo and the intestinal issues cause me to lose those important electrolytes. This past week the teachers at the school where my daughter works have been bringing meals - this has encouraged me to eat - my tongue has sores on it and food just doesn't taste that great - but I have been trying out all the delicious meals that the teachers have been preparing - it has been wonderful. I am drinking water and also V8 juice which has a lot of potassium in it.

Staying hydrated is so important - even spiritually. I read these verses today: Job 14:7-9
7 For there is hope for a tree: If it is cut down, it will sprout again, And its tender shoot will not cease.
8 Though its root grows old in the earth, And its trunk dies in the dirt,
9 At the scent of water it will bud and will produce branches like a new plant.

These verses are so encouraging! At the scent of water the tree will produce branches - where there is life, there is hope! How much we need to stay in the river of water of life day by day, moment by moment. How often just hearing a verse or reading a line of a hymn produces a life-bud in me. Lately I have been worried about whether I have been gaining the Lord through this ordeal. But I was encouraged by these verses today to just stay watered - and spend my days sniffing out water so that the Lord's life in me can grow.

The next step is that I will need to have a small surgery to have the IP port removed - this will be sometime in December. Then I will have to have CT scans and blood tests to see what is happening with the cancer. Please pray that I can stay hydrated and that the side effects subside.

Much love to all of you - and many thanks for your encouraging words, your prayer and your love.
Joanne

chemo complete

Hi Everyone,
Sorry I haven't written much - this has been a scary week - I had trouble stabilizing those electrolytes and kept feeling faint - I am still a bit wobbly. The chemo was okay - just oh so bloating. What a treat to find out that teachers at Boston Trinity have offered to bring meals for my family for the next week! Bringing meals is such a supply to my family - especially since my husband doesn't really cook and hasn't acquired the skill of menu planning among his million other skills. I can see how he can relax at least about the meals, which is so wonderful.

The chemo needle was hard to insert this time which was painful but endurable. Thank You Lord for Your grace - Here is a testimony Watchman Nee wrote about healing:

"Some illnesses are healed immediately; others are not. Once when sick, I asked the Lord to heal me. The Lord said, “The healing will not take place quickly, but My grace is sufficient for you.” Then the Lord showed me something. A boat sailing in the middle of a stream was facing a big rock and could not get through. The Lord asked me, “Shall I remove the rock so you can get through, or shall I raise the water level so that you can go over it?” At that moment I was clear concerning the Lord’s will, and I said, “Lord, I do not ask to have the problem removed; I ask for an increase of Your grace.”"

This testimony has always touched me - I want the boulder removed and sometimes it is. But when it is not, I need to be reminded that the Lord wants to increase grace to me. What a wonderful gift - this increased grace.

So, the next step is to see the surgeon about having the IP port removed, have a CT scan to see how effective the chemo has been - this will all be done after THanksgiving. Please pray that I am not to saddled by side effects and that I am not dehydrated from the intestinal difficulties.

Another 2 verses that really supplied me this week are 1 Peter 1:7-8:
1 Peter 1 : 7 ---- 1 Peter 1 : 8

7 So that the proving of your faith, much more precious than of gold which perishes though it is proved by fire, may be found unto praise and glory and honor at the revelation of Jesus Christ;

8 Whom having not seen, you love; into whom though not seeing Him at present, yet believing, you exult with joy that is unspeakable and full of glory,

Sometimes in the fire-y trial it is hard to see the Lord - but I do love this One whom I have not seen - and I know whom I have believed. He is able. Praise Him!

Love you all,
Joanne