I called today about the CT scan and the nurse told me that it was mostly unremarkable with the exception of the hernia which is involving more of the colon. She told me I need to follow up with the surgeon to get this hernia repaired. I will do this today. The CT scan shows no growth in the nodules and showed some nodules in the chest area which they think are benign. They didn't do a CA-125 blood test and all the other blood work was okay. I haven't heard from the surgeon who is doing the hernia repair, but the nurse said that should be a priority, so I will call him tomorrow. We've had a disaster of sorts in our house - a flooded heating system that burst out of a radiator on the top floor of the house and flooded down through all the floors into the basement! You just can't imagine the amount of water. Apparently we have lots of water in the ceilings, so they will have to be replaced - so please pray about the working out of all the details - and the stress level in the house and all the burden on Paul. Lately I have been kind of tired when I come home from the library, so I've been sleeping through dinner! Not so good for the family. I am still trying to eat cruciferous vegetables but sometimes I don't have the energy to cook. It's like the children of Israel in the good land - the manna stopped and they had to labor for their food. I do believe that there is the grace from the Lord to continue to eat this way but sometimes I don't have the energy to do all that chopping. Although today I made a healthier version of a Polish stuffed cabbage recipe - using ground turkey and brown rice. It wasn't the same but it wasn't too bad - and I could eat it, which is a treat.
I realized this past week that my being up out of bed is because of the prayers - it reminded me of Dorcas in Acts - I'm sure you know the account, but in case you don't:
Acts 9:36-42
36 Now in Joppa there was a certain disciple named Tabitha (which, when translated, is Dorcas); this woman was full of good works and alms which she did.
37 And in those days she became ill and died; and they bathed her body and laid it in an upper room.
38 Now because Lydda was near Joppa, the disciples heard that Peter was there, and they sent two men to him, entreating him, Do not delay to come through to us.
39 And Peter rose up and went with them. When he arrived, they led him up into the upper room. And all the widows stood by him, weeping and showing him tunics and garments, all of which Dorcas had made while she was with them.
40 And Peter put them all outside; and kneeling down, he prayed; and he turned to the body and said, Tabitha, rise up. And she opened her eyes; and when she saw Peter, she sat up.
41 And giving her his hand, he raised her up. And when he had called the saints and the widows, he presented her alive.
42 And it became known throughout all of Joppa and many believed on the Lord.
Not that I am a Dorcas - or that I died or anything - but those whom Dorcas served would not let her die - but sent to Peter to come to pray for her. Dorcas' service was necessary and so the Lord gave her back to the brothers and sisters. I don't know how necessary my service is, but I do know that all the prayers have caused the Lord to give me more time, to give me back to serve Him and the members of His body. I am in awe of this and each day continue to pray that I will fulfill the Lord's purpose for me to have this extended time.
Please continue to pray about this hernia and the next surgery - and for the working out of all the details. I have so much confidence in all the faithful prayers. I am reminded of James 5:16b-18: "...The petition of a righteous man avails much in its working. Elijah was a man of like feeling with us, and he earnestly prayed that it would not rain; and it did not rain on the earth for three years and six months. And he prayed again, and heaven gave rain, and the earth sprouted forth with its fruit.
The Life Study of James, Message 9 says this about these verses:
"...indicate that a prayer from the Lord was given to Elijah, in which he prayed. He did not pray in his feeling, thought, intention, mood, or in any kind of motivation from circumstances or situations for the fulfilling of his own purpose. He prayed in the prayer given him by the Lord for the accomplishing of His will.
In verse 16 James speaks of the operating petition of a righteous man. This indicates that in praying for the sick, we need to pray in the way of an operating petition. This means that we should not pray without a burden. Rather, we need to pray as Elijah prayed.
In verse 17 James says that in prayer Elijah prayed that it should not rain. In other words, Elijah prayed in a prayer. The King James Version says that Elijah prayed earnestly. However, to pray in a prayer actually does not mean to pray earnestly. James does not tell us that Elijah prayed in earnestness; he says that Elijah prayed in a prayer.
What is the meaning of this expression, to pray in a prayer? The prayer that Elijah prayed was great, for he prayed that it would not rain on earth for three years and six months. This is much greater than praying for the healing of a sick person. After three and a half years, Elijah prayed again, this time praying that heaven would give rain. Elijah could pray in this way because God gave him a prayer, because God burdened him with a prayer. In other words, Elijah had the burden to pray in a particular way, and that burden was a prayer given to him by God.
We should not pray according to our memory, observation, or our own burden. On the contrary, we must have a burden from God to pray for a certain thing, just as Elijah was burdened with the prayer given to him by God. God gave Elijah a prayer, and in that prayer Elijah prayed. This is not a matter of praying in earnest. It is a matter that God, in His move and according to His plan, gave Elijah a prayer, and Elijah was burdened to pray the prayer that God gave him. Therefore, Elijah prayed in a prayer.
May the Lord continue to strengthen us into our inner man and may we pray His prayers moment by moment as our breathing.
Here is a hymn for your enjoyment about breathing:
1 O Lord, breathe Thy Spirit on me,
Teach me how to breathe Thee in;
Help me pour into Thy bosom
All my life of self and sin.
I am breathing out my sorrow,
Breathing out my sin;
I am breathing, breathing, breathing,
All Thy fulness in.
2 I am breathing out my own life,
That I may be filled with Thine;
Letting go my strength and weakness,
Breathing in Thy life divine.
3 Breathing out my sinful nature,
Thou hast borne it all for me;
Breathing in Thy cleansing fulness,
Finding all my life in Thee.
4 I am breathing out my sorrow,
On Thy kind and gentle breast;
Breathing in Thy joy and comfort,
Breathing in Thy peace and rest.
5 I am breathing out my sickness,
Thou hast borne its burden too;
I am breathing in Thy healing,
Ever promised, ever new.
6 I am breathing out my longings
In Thy listening, loving ear;
I am breathing in Thy answers,
Stilling every doubt and fear.
7 I am breathing every moment,
Drawing all my life from Thee;
Breath by breath I live upon Thee,
Lord, Thy Spirit breathe in me.
Breath by breath, we live upon Him! Keep breathing!
Much love to you all,
Joanne
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